A peace of pi

Wish me a happy birthday tomorrow

Sat, 13 Dec 2008 20:29:07 GMT

Cause it's going to be boring

haha wut

Sun, 13 Apr 2008 03:28:10 GMT

Bitchin'.

Sat, 14 Apr 2007 04:08:32 GMT

Oh yeah, this thing exists.

I will fill you in on the latest, considering the only entry before FUCK: SHIT was like forever ago

so uhhHHhhh, Lexi and I are okay. If you haven't found out from me since that last update, here it is. Some time in January, I think, Lexi and I started talking again. It was slow, but it worked. We became easy friends again, and eventually started hitting on each other (again). We were almost at the point of 'dating' again, but after a reality check one day I realized it was not healthy for me, and the odds of it going anywhere were really low. So I told her that day, and we kind of went back to normal.

Present day: We're basically back to the pre-dating thing, after a lot of stuff. I'm not sure how it's gonna go from here, but I will tell you that I think it can work, I just don't know how. So, I'm never letting go of Lexi again, unless I have to. I don't want to lose her a third time.

In school, I'm doing pretty well all over except physics. This marking period I got a 60. D:

I still play GunZ, and my penis is a half inch bigger. Thanks for listening.

FUCK

Tue, 13 Mar 2007 02:43:52 GMT

SHIT

I don't get a break, ever

Wed, 06 Dec 2006 21:57:17 GMT

Phruit Chan: . . . wow

Phruit Chan: *comes home to this*

Stylus Found: ?

Phruit Chan: sorry not pasting >_>

Stylus Found: Why :-(

Phruit Chan: flamingducky@hotmail.co.uk: i know you probally dont want to know me. or even see me. but can we please talk sometime? im sorry..

Phruit Chan: aaaand, after checking my other gmail account

Phruit Chan: i only just read your last 2 email 10 minutes ago. I doubt youll read this,
i doubt you even want to see my name. but i am sorry. im sorry for treating
you so badly for so long. im sorry for being so cold towards you. im sorry
for being distant. i know im not the easiest person to talk to in the world.
i have too many things id rather not share. but i truely am sorry. i dont
really have any idea what to say so ill give up now. Bye Brandon.

Stylus Found: Talk to her if you want.

Stylus Found: Maybe you can fix things

Phruit Chan: only thing I can do is be her friend

Phruit Chan: whether she's sorry or not, what she did was ridiculous

Phruit Chan: but, damn

Phruit Chan: I don't know what to think

Phruit Chan: she hasn't checked her email in over a month?

Stylus Found: Yeah

Stylus Found: I would have told you the same thing.

Stylus Found: But.

Stylus Found: It's your life and I'd rather not tell you what to do.

Phruit Chan: I know but I come to you so you can do that sometimes >_>

Phruit Chan: so she neglects her email, blocks me for that long, and just now decided it'd be a good idea to talk cause she found the email

Phruit Chan: what the fuck is that

Phruit Chan: and I was having a pretty good day .-.

Stylus Found: Don't let it get to you

Stylus Found: You're better than that :-)

Phruit Chan: I think I'll email her back

Phruit Chan: to save the wait

Phruit Chan: by the way, randell says the white gurl most likely likes me

Stylus Found: cool

Phruit Chan: can't hit it quite yet

Phruit Chan: can't go back to my own skin color AND not know her

Stylus Found: loool

----

About the last part, Randell's girlfriend's best friend seems to have a thing for me after exchanging a few comments on Myspace. LOL.

lol

Mon, 20 Nov 2006 15:13:20 GMT

nostopgosh: aww

nostopgosh: i'm not good at e-relationships, and i hate long distance stuff >_<

nostopgosh: i hella love you though, brandon. fo realz.

nostopgosh: you're freakin awesome

nostopgosh: ::BIG HUG::

Since no one comments anything I post, IM me if you care LOL

fucking shit

Fri, 10 Nov 2006 03:29:38 GMT

Phruit Chan: got a minute?

icerose1008: yes :)

Phruit Chan: so

Phruit Chan: after about 11 days of thinking lexi was grounded or something, with no record of her signing on at all

Phruit Chan: I log on to a new account and send a message, guess who happens to be online

icerose1008: Okay

icerose1008: Her?

icerose1008: She blocked you?

Phruit Chan: yeah

Phruit Chan: sorry for late response

icerose1008: its okay

icerose1008: why did sh e block you?

icerose1008: thats..

icerose1008: not..

icerose1008: good..

icerose1008: o_O

Phruit Chan: I guess it's her way of saying she wants to break up, fuck if I know

Phruit Chan: 11 days ago she said she didn't want to talk about it, when I set trillian to automatically send her a specific message when she signed on

icerose1008: :(

icerose1008: why would she do that though?

icerose1008: was it sudden?

icerose1008: or did you guys have problems?

Phruit Chan: no more than usual, she was on one day

Phruit Chan: I said hi she said hi

Phruit Chan: I said something I don't remember, 5 minutes later "/poke"

Phruit Chan: she said "ffs. bye." and after that I made the message to automatically send

Phruit Chan: saying "hey" isn't a good indicator that you're mad

icerose1008: ffs?

Phruit Chan: for fuck's sake, fuck sakes, something

Phruit Chan: to the automatic message I got

Phruit Chan: ok well im not in a good mood to talk. bye Brandon.

icerose1008: :(

icerose1008: thats mean

icerose1008: at least she capitalised your name :|

Phruit Chan: now I sign on to msn with a gmail account, message her (to see if she's there) with "..." and she says "hey?"

icerose1008: O_o

icerose1008: girls suck

Phruit Chan: didn't know it was me but I'm sure she does now

icerose1008: oh.

icerose1008: did she block that too?

Phruit Chan: I don't know

Phruit Chan: me: well I guess you really didn't intend on talking to me again

Phruit Chan: me: okay

Phruit Chan: /sign off

icerose1008: :(

icerose1008: wait

icerose1008: /sign off = her or you?

Phruit Chan: me

icerose1008: why you ?

Phruit Chan: wasn't worth waiting for a response, to me

icerose1008: ohh. :(

icerose1008: or she may have said something hurtful or something =/'

Phruit Chan: I sent her an email from the gmail account, though I don't expect any sort of reply

Thu, 28 Sep 2006 00:01:14 GMT

Shit, I've been neglecting the fuck out of this
lolol

Let's see. Lexi and I are still together, not many rough spots since I last posted. She's grounded though, so I don't see her often D:

Grades in school as far as I know are: C F A A C C. F in English cause I didn't do the summer reading again, but I managed to pull the Physics grade from who knows what to a C. I don't even know how, all I know is that it was magically a 70 when I looked.

GunZ is going good, and North America is going to get its own service soon. Hopefully there will be IP blocks implemented to take care of the rest of the world - it'll be open to everyone in the beta D:

I'm a pretty funny guy, but I can't keep it up all day. Sometimes I'll be in school and my friend I sit next to will have everyone in stitches and I'm jealous of his quick wit. Pretty stupid thing to complain about, but whatever. Although I seem to do fine, with the making people laugh and all, when I'm alone. If I'm in the presence of another funny person, I usually just don't try

Hm, what else. I've been going to Kiria's house lately, which has been pretty fun. Jeff lives over there, and the three of us always have a good time with whatever we're doing. It seems like I go there and bond with Jeff more, but I guess it's cause we're guys. They have lots of interesting friends, too - some who aren't very good at driving and could blow up some commies with all the F-bombs they drop, as I once put it >_>

I've been trying to learn C++ so I can hopefully find a career later on, but this shit is hard. I'll try to get a book on it sooner or later, maybe as a present for Christmas or some shit. I've been told by a few different hackers that books are much better than online tutorials. So far I can only do trivial things, hopefully a book will help out

My hair's a mop now, 4real. My bangs are a little too long, and they're starting to curl at the end. I probably have Bleys-esque shit going on in the back, too; I need to take care of it eventually. Hope I can get lasik surgery, or even contacts (the latter seems scary) so I can do away with these glasses. Circles under my eyes or not, I think I'd be better off without them.
-------

I'm yet to really tell anyone about what follows, I figured I should get if off my chest. Now's a good time.

So a while ago, it's been more than a few months. I don't know. My parents were fighting as usual, but it was getting bad. I don't remember how it went, since it was longer than a day ago, but my mom eventually sat me down and told me the situation. My dad had been having an affair with a woman where he worked. They kept this from me and tried to make it look like nothing was wrong (well it's the thought that counts) so I wouldn't be worried.

Not too long after, my dad's about to move out. I guess he couldn't decide between my mom who he's been with for over 20 years or the new bitch at work he just met, but he had to go. He did move out, and lived in an apartment. He came over on the weekends in an attempt to bond with me and keep things normal. Needless to say I was a bit too upset with him to take him seriously. He'd taken me to Sonny's (a place we liked eating at before I found out about all this) and came to help mow the lawn.

My mom was stressed out, completely. I was worried for her health, I heard her crying every day. Sooner or later we started having "family" days, in some attempt to have a sense of family. I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm not really used to my parents always getting along, ever, really. So I was cautious about how optimistic I was. We went to see a couple movies, and sat my dad between us with hope.

My dad did come back, though he didn't really quit pulling shit. Apparently he kept lying about where he was, and he'd seen his girlfriend a few times while moved back with us.

I guess he's over her at this point, I fucking hope he is anyway. I guess we've been paying half her bills for her apartment or some shit, I'm not sure what's been going on. All I know is my mom was pissed off about the amount of non-necessary bills we were helping to cover.

Seems okay right now, I just hope he's finally quit it.
------

A little before I found out about the adultery going on, my grandma went to the hospital. She was with us at a restaurant the night before she initially went. She ended up being there for quite a while, and my mom went there every day to help my grandpa and stuff.

We later found out she had some form of cancer, and would probably die within about 6 months to a year, or so. This, combined with my dad's shenanigans, was not easy at all on my poor mom, I didn't know if she'd make it through all this. My grandma used a wheelchair for a few months, and after a while could walk pretty well on her own and cook.

One day, my mom came to me saying she had great news. My grandma had beaten the odds, she was one in a million as the doctor said, who'd gotten rid of the cancer or something, somehow. She was going to live. We rejoiced, and no one was sad anymore.

A couple weeks ago, I found out she was in the hospital again. I guess she'd fallen down at night and that'd caused her a lot of trouble. I went there with my dad, and we waited in the ER for about an hour before they moved her to a real room. We all went to her new room with her, and the nurse asked my mom and grandpa a sheet full of questions. I was informed that my grandma was probably not going to make it. When she died, it'd be in her sleep.

My mom had to get some supplies at my grandparents' house, mainly stuff for my grandpa, and she took me. Before leaving, I hugged my grandma and told her I loved her. I'm pretty sure she heard me, since she reacted to me being there when my dad and I got there, but there wasn't much of a reaction. That was the last time I saw my grandma, she passed away the next morning.
-----

Nothing much more to say that can follow that. I wish Lexi wasn't grounded, it's uncomfortable when I'm used to not talking to her.

hay

Tue, 15 Aug 2006 20:11:18 GMT

test test test lolol

Sat, 10 Jun 2006 02:19:48 GMT

Have any of you played the original Pokemon (Red or Blue) games on the Gameboy? Man, that was the shit. If you haven't, you sure as Hell better do it.

I remember back when I lived in South Dakota, 3rd or 4th grade I finally got my Pokemon Red long after the fad had started (We didn't quite have the funds to match my friends to get a Gameboy and game). I was so excited that Christmas morning, I spent all day playing. I immediately popped in the AA batteries and started my quest. Which Pokemon do I choose? Ah, I went with Charmander. He looked like a fighter. Professor Oak asked me if I wanted to give him a nickname. I was about 10 years old at the time, this sounded like a plan. I dubbed my new buddy "Flame" and we set off.

Flame and I went through a lot together. The first gym battle was a motherfucker, if anything. I mean, all Brock had were fucking rock-types. I had a low level fire Pokemon, with some even lower friends. But eventually, I overcame Onyx and won that badge. Next one, do I get a break? Of course not. Flame had to deal with water Pokemon, this time. Luckily, somehow, I had found a Pikachu in the forest. He stuck up for my team, I'd have been fucked without him.

Fast forward a bit, my little Flame has evolved into a Charmeleon, and I specifically remember him knowing Seismic Toss. One of my favorite new moves for him to use, and it worked well. I remember to this day being on the boat (Though I don't recall the name, something like S.S. Anne) and having Flame evolve into Charizard. Needless to say, I owned the shit out of the entire population of the boat on my way to wherever the Hell I was going, even if they had water types.

Fast forward a lot more. I've gotten all the badges, and even caught Mewtwo. Flame's been by my side the entire journey, and has reached level 97 (ENTIRELY legit, with maybe one Rare Candy). Through the whole game, I've been paying more attention to my starter obviously, and it was the one that fainted the least.

At the time before I finally put the game down to rest, I realize there is some kind of connection. AI probably did not exist in Red, and I doubt it existed in any of the following ones. But I still felt something, something undescribable. The trust, the love, the partnership. I'd endured the entire Pokemon journey, and Flame had been there with me the entire time. It's all in my head, you're thinking. I just want to think that Flame acted differently, though he's just a collection of pixels and data. You can hammer sense into my head all you want, but I think there's some magic involved, that only Nintendo could provide.

Six years old, and a little stupid. But that's my inspirational entry. Maybe it'll revive some heart-warming memories for you.

Wed, 07 Jun 2006 03:44:06 GMT

God. I hate it when foreigners say they hate Americans because they're stupid or something. Or that we all support George Bush and the stupid shit he does. Get a clue, assholes. We're not the sole superpower for no reason. We probably have a higher literacy rate than you, too. Would you like it if I said all [non-Americans] couldn't read or write and like being buttfucked by their dictator or queen? No, that'd be generalizing.

Sun, 14 May 2006 20:22:19 GMT

It gets more and more fun. D:

****** ********* (************@hotmail.co.uk)
To:
shadygoat@hotmail.com
Subject:
im sorry...

Brandon, im sorry ive been such a bitch to you lately... i have had some
real life problems and i took them out on you. i know i really shouldnt and
i feel so bad and im sorry. i understand if you dont wana know me... its
probally safer like that anyway..

i miss you... i love you...

Sat, 13 May 2006 03:42:08 GMT

(3:59:11 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: so in the English exam
(3:59:25 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: one of our essay things was on A Lesson Before Dying
(4:00:03 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: which if you havent read, basically a black guy is in the wrong place wrong time and is accused of murder, sentenced to death by electric chair, and till then the protagonist visits him in jail and teaches him how to be a man
(4:00:24 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: anyway
(4:00:34 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: our essay for that was divided into non-essay sections
(4:00:47 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: and one was list 7 people you think represent manhood in america
(4:00:48 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: I chose
(4:01:03 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: Chuck Norris: rugged, ready for adventure
(4:01:16 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: Vin Diesel: hardcore, "action man"
(4:01:30 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: Mr. T: pities da foo' who isn't manly (shows compassion)
(4:01:46 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: Chris Rock: ridiculously offensive, hilarious
(4:02:02 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: The red Power Ranger: a leader, takes charge in dangerous situations
(4:02:25 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: Mario (of Nintendo): goes on long adventures, jumps on anyone's head who gets in his way
(4:02:50 PM) Cheez Waffle1214: Link (Legend of Zelda): ends up helping everyone he meets, goes to and from a teenager, has a cool sword

Fri, 12 May 2006 01:44:04 GMT

Er, long story short, I'm through with Lexi. Too much bullshit to put up with. n_n

Then I decided Zoe > all, so I'm after her again, with her consent.

If anyone wanted to talk to me from 9:43 to 11:30 pm my time, sorry, I was (am) too tired and went (am going) to sleep. Ya get skeeted on!

Wed, 10 May 2006 21:42:37 GMT

Ugh. I wonder why I try sometimes.

(5:28:00 PM) Miss Kitty: i give up.
(5:28:04 PM) Miss Kitty: im done with being ignored.
(5:28:09 PM) Miss Kitty: blocked... hope you have fun.
The user has removed you from his or her contact list.

Ignored? What the fucking hell? I was trying to talk to her. I mean, she usually doesn't respond at this time, but I'm trying to keep up a relationship with communication here. You know, I said I think about her a lot, but it's usually thinking/worrying about the drama. I love her, but it'd be nice to know when she's feeling pissy. A heads up, amirite?

No wonder I didn't want a girlfriend.

Sun, 07 May 2006 07:17:09 GMT

I don't want to type it out again, so here's the story through an MSN conversation with Zoe.

(12:27:23 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: hay
(12:27:32 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: do you feel like consoling someone right now? -_-
(12:28:08 AM) We all feed on tragedy; it's like blood to a vampire.: o.o What happened?
(12:28:30 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: nothing yet, and I hope it stays that way
(12:28:36 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: but I want to throw up D:
(12:28:45 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: but uh
(12:29:05 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: lexi and I were playing gunz, nothing different, and I came on after she did
(12:29:25 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: and there's this guy in the same room she is, and I got the impression he was hitting on her to some extent
(12:29:41 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: I held my tongue, cause you know what an asshole I can be to strangers
(12:30:04 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: and he eventually leaves, and it seems fine
(12:30:19 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: then he comes back, and she tells [everyone in the room] to vote him out of the room
(12:30:40 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: so he comes back on another character after he gets kicked, and keeps harassing her (I don't know what's going on at this point)
(12:30:59 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: he keeps asking her to check her AIM messages, and when he leaves the room she acts pissed off
(12:31:23 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: so after a while. I think it's his fault, she leaves to go to bed
(12:31:33 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: then it's just him and me and two other guys in the lobby
(12:31:46 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: and I casually ask what's going on
(12:31:59 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: he says they used to be together and broke up for stupid reasons, then got back together and broke up again
(12:32:08 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: but she 'still likes him'
(12:32:19 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: according to him anyway
(12:32:34 AM) We all feed on tragedy; it's like blood to a vampire.: According to him-Yeah.
(12:32:39 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: I know
(12:33:00 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: but she's got a couple of these stalker people, she made me shoo one away yesterday
(12:33:11 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: I'm really worried about all these past relationships of hers
(12:33:14 AM) We all feed on tragedy; it's like blood to a vampire.: v_v Take random girl advice. Ex boyfriends who say that are 99% of the time not telling the truth.
(12:34:40 AM) We all feed on tragedy; it's like blood to a vampire.: Hm, well, I'm not sure what exactly to say about that...since I don't know her like you do. It just depends on what kind of person she is, and if you trust her.
(12:35:45 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: well, I don't think she would ever try to be with another guy, she seems to genuinely care for me, appreciate me, and knows I feel the same way about her
(12:35:46 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: it's just
(12:35:56 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: all these guys doing these things
(12:36:01 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: it's really unsettling
(12:36:11 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: whether she likes them or not
(12:37:17 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: I just hope all this doesnt cause us to break up
(12:37:28 AM) lancevorgin: you hit a breakpoint || Cheez Waffle1214: bonus stage!: I haven't been emo in a long time, and I don't plan on it any time soon

Sat, 06 May 2006 00:36:14 GMT

I almost threw up today. Lexi told me some guy wouldn't leave her alone, and I got his AIM name, so I could harass him.

I harassed him, and he said he didn't know why she'd be annoyed, she apparently told him she loved him every day and he thought she wanted to be with him (This is after I mentioned my "boyfriend" status). So my heart rate increases and I ask her what the hell that's supposed to mean, and she asked why she'd tell me to harass him if there was something going on - which makes sense. Then she said he's wanted her forever and even tried to ruin an old relationship of hers.

He then IM'd me notifying me of his surrender, of sorts, and disappeared from existance. Scary.

What a cock sucker, everyone's after my beautiful treasure. D:

Wed, 03 May 2006 03:45:21 GMT

Dear Journal,

Lexi (trying to sound normal) left early today. Found her on server 2, and she ended up rejoining a "partner clan" she quit a while ago. I'd been spamming her on MSN wondering where she was, then tried GunZ, and that was it. During her game (I was waiting for her) the server reset, and everyone had to log back on. We all got back to the clan channel, and the server reset again. She left a couple seconds after signing on, and didn't come back saying her mom was there or she disconnected.

Journal, I also wrote a song for her! Well, one verse anyway. That's all you need! No more details on that, and you're not finding out what the words are either, journal. God, I hate this 5 hour difference.

Checking the buddy list every time you hear the sign-on sound really makes a guy feel lonely.

Also, after going through the SQL database of POPBoards, I found the birthdate she entered when registering. On September 15, I need to give her something super special, but I don't know what the hell it should be. Of course, I've got 4 months to figure that out. God, I hope we survive till then.

Speaking of that, you all better hope we do too, for all your sakes. If we ever end this, I will weep for days straight and will become extremely fucking emo. That was like, two adjectives. No wait, extremely is an adverb. But I digress, I don't like being depressed. So I really hope I can manage to say the right things.

Ugh, she's one of the most wonderful things to happen to me, and I'm really thankful to have her, but she's got to be bipolar or something. D: That ended up pretty long. Hell, I forgot what I said. Pretty girls give me amnesia.

obtw: I hope you like my new userpic thing. I usually just keep it at one for as long as possible, but change was necessary. Back last year or so when I was crazy about remembering all my Power Ranger memories, I stumbled upon a lot of things that were familiar and some unfamiliar ones, too. This particular scene is the real Tommy (left) with a fake one (right). I forget what's going on, exactly, but the whole notion of two of the same person morphing into the new and old forms was just really orgasmic for a nostalgic feeling. And damn, the imposter green ranger uses the old Dragonzord, which was thought to be lost forever! D: That show has way too many loopholes. I need to go to bed, bye.

Sun, 30 Apr 2006 03:23:39 GMT

Oh my God. I know I don't have a God, but oh, someone's god.

Easy things first:
Alright, a couple people on my friends list have apparently never been introduced to the revolutionary "paragraph". It separates main ideas, and makes the entire bit of text more attractive. I can't count the number of friend entries I just skip over cause they're one big block of text. Please, make it readable. D:

Second:
I'm sure you remember my last entry, eons ago, about Miss Kitty. Online relationships are typically not worth it, to me anyway, and I swore not to date again a while ago. But she's just..ugh.

I pissed her off on accident today, I'm still not good at detecting moods from her I guess. I chased her on GunZ and found her in a TDM, and we 'whispered' each other for a bit. She'd pretty much forgiven me by the end of the match, but I knew it wasn't completely fixed yet. I proceeded to talk to her on MSN after we both left GunZ, and we ended up having a heart-to-heart which really made the night better afterward.

She told me she didn't know why I liked her at all, and why I kept going after her. I told her exactly this, she's what I'm looking for in a girl. She has a sense of humor (laughs at anything offensively funny I say), is intelligent (knows PHP/MYSQL), and the fact that she's beautiful is just my luck. I guess that made her feel better, and we kept talking. Then I told her what I said earlier; I've been turned off from dating for a long time, and she makes me feel good about it - all the way in England.

This ended with an "I love you" from her, I was in GunZ so I didn't get the chance to respond before she left. I don't take that phrase lightly, I've never said it (literally, I couldn't) until this relationship. She said she loved me once, and I said it back, honestly to be nice. I didn't think she really meant it. But as the relationship has progressed, it really feels like she completes my day. Seeing her name online makes me happy, waiting for her response makes me happy, thinking about her makes me happy. Oh, and I think about her a lot. Borderline obsessive probably, but I think about her every day, and quite often. I can't go one period in school without daydreaming about her.

The only thing that really bothers me, besides how she's so easily agitated, is that I don't even call her by her real name by habit. I've always called her Kitty (Miss Kitty) since that's how I know her on GunZ. A little sad, I guess. But I told her this, she doesn't really care. She calls me Brandon from time to time, I call her Amanda (or Lexi) from time to time, though less often than the former.

I hope some day I can go to the UK, or she can come to Florida, so I can hug her. I don't plan on letting go till she slaps me for suffocating her, either.

EDIT: Was thinking I could call her sometime, maybe that would help. But:
1) I despise talking on the phone (I suck at it)
2) She might find the idea awkward
3) (semi-important) Long distance rates D:
4) (not important) Using the phone would kill my bad connection D:

Sat, 01 Apr 2006 02:05:47 GMT

Gah. I meet all these wonderful people online, and not in real life. Including and typically limited to girls.

(2:07:48 AM) Miss Kitty - Pop Rocks My World <3 lol: anyway hun... im yours... only thing ima be in love wit at college is the doggies xD

(In England they apparently go to college at 17)

FUXLIFE

Mon, 27 Mar 2006 02:28:11 GMT

Don't click if you're sensitive about Christianity.

So my dad made me go to church last night. It was like the worst hour I've been through in a while. I didn't want to go at all, so that didn't help. Not to mention it was all bullshit to me.

They said you can still go to Heaven if you get 'saved' and believe in Jesus. So what happens if you're a rebellious Christian who decides not to go to church or worry about Christ? Or someone like me, a typical atheist - I guess we'll just rot in the ground when we die. But why would the ever-so-kind God let that happen? And everyone from every other religion is just insane I guess, since God says there are no other gods.

People came up to the stage (it's a contemporary church where alt. rock Christian bands perform) and told of their miracle stories. BS about how having Jesus in their lives helped them get through problems and shit. Well, you can do all that without wasting a day a week every week every year worshipping a fairy tale omniscient power.

Plus, it's not like Jesus is that credible of a guy. He was a long-haired crazy Jew, who had a lot of crazy Jewish followers - who also probably had long hair. He just made up his own religion and everyone decided it was good since no one liked Judaism or the whole Muslim deal.

Tue, 21 Mar 2006 01:55:08 GMT

Russian doctors have conducted an 11-hour operation to replace a patient’s deformed penis with one grown on his forearm, the Moskovskiy Komsomolets daily reports.

The 30-year-old Russian man, whose name was changed in the article to protect his privacy, had a defect from birth — his penis was crooked, two-and-a-half-inches long and lacked a scrotum, the newspaper writes.

The doctors had the penis removed and attached to the man’s arm. Using his body tissue it grew to six-and-a-half inches and was sewn back on to his groin. Silicone tubes were inserted into the organ to ensure an erection was possible. Doctors also created a scrotum from the patient’s own skin and placed silicone testicles in it.

A Moscow surgeon said the man will be able to have sex in a few months. He added: “Women will never suspect it is artificial.”
Image

Wed, 01 Mar 2006 00:16:56 GMT

So I was in class today, we'd all finished FCAT, and I was reading Anthony Blanton's TigerDirect magzinepamphlet thing. I overheard, well more like heard, some bitches and a fat bitch talking on the other side of the room, and it went something like this.
Girl 1: *something about "Brandon"*
Girl 2: He's really smart, but when you talk to him it's like uggh
Girl ?: And some day you know some day he'll grow up to be handsome and [not translated].

Lawl, don't know if I should be offended or flattered.

Someone leave a comment, god damn.

Fri, 24 Feb 2006 02:20:22 GMT

1--Have we kissed?
2--Do you want to?
3--Are we close friends?
What do you think of my:
6--Face?
7--Eyes?
8--Smile?
11--Clothes?
12--Body?
Do you think I'm:
14--Hot?
15--Shexshy?
16--Cute?
Personality:
Do you think I'm:
17--Crazy?
18--Nice?
19--Funny?
20--Fun to be around?
21--Annoying?
Would you:
22--Spend a week with me?
25--Care if I ran away?
26--Care if I died?
27--Hang out with me?
What would you do if:
28--I kissed you?
29--You found out I was missing?
30--You found out I was in the hospital?
31--You found out I was dead?
32--I told you I loved you?
33--I told you I hated you?
34--Someone told you that I wanted to kiss you?
35--Someone told you I had a crush on you?
In the last week have you:
36--Wanted to kiss me?
37--Wanted to see me?
38--Thought about me?
39--Missed me?
40--Wanted me?
Have I:
41--Kissed you?
42--Hugged you?
43--Made you happy?
44--Made you sad?
45--Made you angry?
46--Made you feel better if you were upset?
Are you:
47--Happy you know me?
48--Wanting to tell me somethng but you cant?
49--Going to put this in your xanga to see wut I say?
50--Wanting to hang out sometime?

Sat, 28 Jan 2006 06:41:46 GMT

In case you didn't get the entry from about two days ago, here's the story.

About 4 hours earlier, I'd officially asked Hira to "be mine", so to speak. All was good for four hours, then it wasn't. I asked if I'd ever get to see what she looked like, and after a lot of making her laugh and getting BS excuses, Randell decided to help.

Randell's more assertive with the opposite sex than I am, so he didn't take the situation gently at all and took some swings with the salmon of truth. Well, Hira came back to me, and I finally found out she didn't want her mom to know she was sending pictures to people. I obviously said, why does she have to know? She tells me she doesn't like lying to her mother, and I say no one does, and does [her mom] even know [Hira] has a boyfriend a couple states away? (This would win the argument if the bomb hadn't dropped)

Hiratana : well no..
Hiratana : but thats the problem
Hiratana : idk if this is gonna work

So yeah, being the veteran at being dumped I am, I knew I was fucked at this point - we were done. We talked some more and she came to the conclusion that being on the computer caused too much drama for her or something, and she needed a break. Oh, did I mention coke sucker was apparently in a ver similar situation to mine? Randell determined I must hate his guts cause he liked her.

So Hira left, and after a couple minutes, it hit hard. Details spared, but I was quite displeased. And all of today I felt pretty decent. I figured, short relationship, short pains.

Well. Tonight it started to come back into effect. I realize how much I really miss talking to her, and all the stuff she usually says/does by now that hasn't happened yet.